This Distraction Inside Of Me, Oh Well
by journaliar
Summary: Waking up nearly face to face with Jade West gives you an inexplicable rush. 1/? Post Tori Goes Platinum
1. Chapter 1

Title: That Distraction Inside Of Me (Oh Well)

Rating: T

Summary: Waking up nearly face to face with Jade West gives you an inexplicable rush.

Disclaimer: I don't own anything.

A/N: Thought I'd try my hand at writing some Victorious. Don't know if I'll continue it or not since real life is kicking my butt but let me know what you think.

* * *

"I'm at your door."

You pull your phone away from your face, blinking blearily at the screen for a moment before pressing it back to your ear. You don't even remember it ringing or even answering it but suddenly Jade's voice was filling your head while you blinked drowsily at the ceiling.

"Jade?" You groan, twisting to glance at the clock on your bedside table that is cheerfully announcing that its just after 2am in neon green numbers. "It's two o'clock in the morning."

You're exhausted and stating the obvious and even half asleep you brace yourself for Jade's sharp tongue but instead there's only a soft exhalation.

"Tori, open the door." She sighs quietly and your belly does a funny flipping thing that makes you sit up, tossing your legs over the side of the bed.

"Are-are you okay?" You wonder, untangling your legs from your blankets before standing. "I mean, is everything…"

"Tori…" She sounds tired instead of irritated and you swallow.

"I'm coming."

It's weird having Jade in your bedroom.

Especially this Jade, dressed in soft blue and grey flannel pants with her hair pulled up into a ridiculous high ponytail, who is delicate and real like you've never seen her. Like an angry, creepy turtle without its shell so all of its soft insides are showing… except not gross.

You close your bedroom door quietly before turning to find Jade standing awkwardly in the center of your bedroom. Not smugly prowling, like you'd expect, fingers dragging over everything you own but instead she looks a little uncomfortable, arms folded over her stomach.

"Is everything okay?" You wonder carefully, treading lightly because you know navigating a conversation with Jade is not so different from waltzing through a mind field.

"Everything is fine." She shrugs with one shoulder, blinking down at your bare feet and you wriggle your toes a little before moving towards your bed, sitting down and shuffling back against the headboard.

"So, what's up? You didn't come here at 2am to kill me, did you?" You joke awkwardly before you realize its not totally bizarre to think that Jade _would _come over to your house in the middle of the night, all disarmingly natural and pretty, to gain your trust before _hacking _you to death with a hatchet and hiding your pieces under your own floorboards. "You-you're not here to kill me? Are you?"

"If I wanted to kill you, you'd already be dead." Jade finally says, meeting your wide-eyed horror coolly and your shoulders drop in relief because that's kind of a good point.

"Oh, then thanks for not doing that?" You offer, running a hand through your hair and watching Jade sit hesitantly at the side of your bed. You're exhausted, the performance at the Platinum Awards and the adrenaline rush that came with it leaving you weary and drained and with a happiness that you feel buzzing down in your bones that not even Jade's ominous appearance at your house in the middle of the night can kill.

"You're welcome." Jade whispers dismissively, staring down at her hands while you gaze at her. You think about what Jade did for you last night, about the way she's sitting in front of you right now and you feel the dopey look that takes over your face. She'd never say it but you guys _are _kinda friends, now more than ever and the thought makes your stomach warm. "I'm here for a reason."

"A non-murderous reason, right?" You grin hopefully and Jade turns to look at you for a long moment.

"I'm here to… thank you." She says very carefully, like the words are foreign on her tongue and there's a little flutter in your chest that makes your toes curl.

"Thank me?" You parrot and Jade glances away, back down to where her fingers are twisted together, "For what?"

"I know…I saw Beck try to kiss you." She whispers tightly, hands squeezing together like she's in _pain _and you sit forward a little bit, pulling your knees to your chest. You didn't do anything wrong, in fact, you did everything _right _but you still feel awful because Jade loves Beck and what she saw must be killing her. "So, thanks for not, ya know, kissing him."

"How?" You manage through your shock and Jade shrugs.

"Cat forgot to kill the chat feed." She mutters. "So I got a front row seat to the Tori and Beck show."

"I'm sorry." You blurt earnestly and Jade glances at you with soft, sad eyes. "I'm just really, _really _sorry."

Jade laughs a little bit and the sound is tired and self-deprecating. "Look at you. You didn't even do anything _wrong _and your apologizing. Of course Beck likes you."

She laughs again and the sound hurts your ears as you watch her push to her feet. "Jade, where are you going?"

"Home." She sighs, standing in front of you vulnerable and muted. "I should go home."

"But its so late." you say, scooting to the edge of the bed to stand too. "I mean, its dangerous and its not exactly like you live down the block…maybe you should just, ya know, stay here tonight?"

You can honestly say that two days ago you wouldn't have believed it if someone told you you'd be insisting Jade stay the night at your house but besides the fact that it is dangerous to be out in Hollywood at this hour, you just don't want her to go.

"Like a slumber party?" Jade asks incredulously and you roll your eyes a little bit.

"No, like two _friends _sleeping within five feet of each other because its late and one of the friends is exhausted and doesn't want to spend all night wondering if the other friend was kidnapped by vagabonds on her way home." You say and Jade's mouth curves with a hint of amusement.

"Fine." She finally breathes and you smile. "But keep your hands to yourself."

You scoff a little, walking to the far side of your bed. "You wish my hands had the urge to wander around you."

You pull down the blankets and ignore the eyebrow you just know Jade is arching in your direction. You dive into bed and Jade slips in beside you hesitantly and wonders aloud if you could have sheets with any lower thread count.

"It's like sleeping on hay."

"Goodnight, Jade." You sigh, burying yourself in your pillow and giving her your back.

"Oh goodnight, Tori Vega." She gurgles in that ridiculous voice she uses to imitate you and you whip your head around to look at her smirking face.

"I don't sound like that." You hiss and Jade just shakes her head, settling on her back and staring up at the ceiling while you take in her profile. "Jade…I'm sorry you're hurting."

Jade looks at you for a moment and you think you've just said the wrong thing and now Jade really is going to murder you but instead of putting a pillow over your face, she just looks back to the ceiling as if its holds the answers she's looking for.

"I don't know if I told you earlier." she starts quietly after a long moment, "But you were great up there tonight."

"Thanks." You breath while that flutter returns to your chest.

"Don't tell anyone I said that."

* * *

Waking up nearly face to face with Jade West gives you an inexplicable rush.

Admittedly, you've had nightmares that start exactly the same way but Jade is pale in the soft morning light, her thick eyelashes and sharp eyebrows an abrupt contrast to her skin and there's a sudden charge under your skin at the sight of her burrowed into her pillow like she is, that isn't crippling fear. Instead, you think it's the fact that you're more or less defying death in this very moment.

You'll fully appreciate the daredevilry of this entire situation later, when you're less drowsy and able to do more then acknowledge the press of Jade's knee against your hip and the rise and fall of her shoulders. Your eyes feel heavy as you gaze at the soft hair at Jade's temples and the sharp curve of her jaw and gosh, she so much less scary this close up.

"Vega, your gay is showing." Jade mumbles suddenly and you almost jump out of your skin with an embarrassing squeak that has Jade's mouth turning up into a grin before her eyes slide open.

"It is not." You argue dumbly, shifting from your side to your back and throwing your arm over your eyes. "I mean…shut up."

There's silence then and you wonder if she's fallen back asleep but when you peek out from under your wrist, she's watching you with clear blue eyes. Her face is indecipherable but calm and you have no idea if your about to be verbally assaulted or if she's going to smile.

Eventually neither of those things happen and instead she arches a studded eyebrow, "Go to sleep, Vega."

You do as she says and you're not at all surprised when you wake up a few hours later and Jade's gone.


	2. Chapter 2

You stare at the slight indentation on the pillow, at the rumpled blankets beside you. Its kind of surreal, the idea of Jade being tucked into bed beside you just hours ago as is the notion that despite that you're still alive and in possession of all of your limbs. In fact it could be some sort of dream, you think, if it weren't for the fact that your brain has clamped down on the memory of Jade beside you, soft and substantial. You think about crazy people, the ones that keep celebrity tissues and chewed wads of gum and if the fact that you even thought of vacuum sealing the pillow Jade used puts you in the same category as them.

Instead you blame it on the fact that you're still really tired and thus you can't be blamed for the strange paths your mind drifts down in its current state.

There's a knock on your door and before you can answer Trina let herself into your room and stalks towards the bed.

"Get up and make me some pancakes." She demands before flopping onto your bed and erasing any evidence that Jade West had been curled up beside you hours ago. You groan as the mattress jostles, turning away from your sister and pulling the blanket up over your head.

"Trina, go away!" You call out but, of course, instead of doing as you request or respecting your space, she decides to spoon you. "Oh my god, go away!"

"Tooorrriiii! I'm starrrrrvvvviiiinnnnggg!" You grimace as she tries to puncture your eardrums with her voice alone and burrow deeper into your blanket.

"If you're so starving go make your own pancakes!" You cry and Trina lets loose an obnoxious whine. "Trina! Seriously?"

"Make them for me and I'll leave you alone all day." Trina offers and you whip the blanket from over your head.

"Swear?" You ask and Trina solemnly holds up three fingers.

"Girls Scouts honor."

"You were never even in the Girl Scouts." You point out, rolling over to glare at your sister who's sporting a very impressive case of bed head.

"So?" She argues and you roll your eyes at her tiredly.

"Fine. I'll make your stupid pancakes." You finally give in and Trina squeals, snuggling into your side.

"How do you feel? I mean, since you're practically a star now?" Trina asks, slinging her leg over yours.

"I am not a star." You laugh, closing your eyes. "And I feel the same. It was a great experience but the record company still wants nothing to do with me."

"Did you tell them about your more talented, compliant, older sister who doesn't mind wearing a meat hat and abusing senior citizens?" Trina wonders and you laugh.

"I didn't."

"Wait. So, how did you end up performing anyway? I thought you got replaced by Jade." Trina wonders and you open your eyes to stare at the ceiling. You remember Jade in her ridiculous costume with sincere eyes and Jade later in pajamas, warm and solid beside you and a nervous feeling tugs in your stomach.

"Jade gave up her spot for me." You finally mutter and now you can feel Trina's eyes on you, wide with surprise. Rightfully so, you think, because Jade isn't nice or friendly and also hates you.

"But Jade kind of despises you." Trina points out helpfully and you turn to look at her.

"No…I mean, yeah, she does but we're also kinda friends." You say, "But it was also sort of a thank you for not kissing Beck when he tried stick his tongue down my throat."

"What?" You cover your ears, to prevent Trina's shrill voice from melting your brain while she pushes herself up to look down at you in disbelief. She shakes your shoulders violently while questions bubble past her lips and you answer them best you can until Trina is just staring at you and shaking her head.

"Lay back down." You request and Trina does, scooting down against the bed absently.

"What did Beck's breath smell like?" Trina asks after a moment and you frown at her.

"I don't know!" You hiss, pausing for a moment while your sister stares at you in disbelief. "Trina, what do you think of Jade?"

"She's a creepy gank." Your sister answers instantly. "I mean, sure she's pretty in that pale, vampire way and she has a decent voice but she's so weird."

"Isn't everyone at Hollywood Arts weird though?" You offer because you know for a fact there are more legitimately weirder kids than Jade West roaming around school and one of them is currently begging you to make her pancakes.

"I guess you're right." Trina says thoughtfully. "She's got great boobs though."

"Yeah…" You mutter absently, ignoring Trina's confused glance. "I think its fake…"

"Her boobs? No way, those are a hundred percent real. I mean have you-"

"I'm not…" You interrupt Trina pointedly. "I am not talking about Jade's boobs right now. I'm talking about her whole…gothic, sinister, violent persona she's got going on."

"Oh." Trina shrugs, sitting up again. "Who cares? I mean, Jade's just Jade and now that she's not dating Beck, she matters even less to me. Besides, let me point out how weird it is that we're talking about her at all when you're supposed to be making me pancakes."

"You're the one who started monologuing about her breasts!" You point out incredulously as Trina clambers out of your bed.

"What can I say? The girl's got a nice rack." Trina shrugs before grabbing your ankle and tugging you out of bed.

* * *

So Jade disappears.

Well, not really but still. She's all but stopped hanging out with you guys and no one seems to _care. _Not Cat or Robbie or Beck or Andre and especially not Beck who seems to split his time between making eyes at you and peeling questionable girls off of himself.

Okay, so that's not really true either because as far as you know Jade does still hang out with Cat and Andre but way less than she used too and she just finished a project with Robbie but he told you that they did most of the work separately and its not the same.

It's been like this for weeks and weeks now and you're over it.

Sure, its nice not to be insulted on a regular basis or have to fear for your well being but also its kinda not so you've gone to find her. And by find her you really mean pseudo-stalk.

**_You live your life You go in shadows_**

You lean against the door frame and feel only slightly creepy as you listen to the voice seeping through the wooden door. The sound is powerful and raw in a way that makes a chill run under your skin. You've spent most of lunch searching for Jade and you hadn't even planed on looking here but there was the faintest voice warning _You'll come apart and you'll go blind _and here you are doing your best impression of a stalker.

**_Some kind of night into your darkness_**

**_Colors your eyes with what's not there._**

You don't knock. Instead you push open the door a little and slip inside noiselessly except for the part where your backpack gets stuck and you screech like a donkey.

Jade turns in the desk chair she's sitting in and immediately looks unimpressed with your entire being as you stumble into the classroom and the door successfully shuts behind you now that your backpack isn't wedged between it and the doorway.

"Oh," You swallow awkwardly, giving Jade a weak wave. "hello there."

"What're you doing in here, Tori?" Jade asks and she doesn't seem as infuriated as you would expect so you shrug and fix your bag on your shoulder.

"Actually, I was looking for you." You admit. "You haven't been around at lunch all week and I just…I haven't really seen you since our impromptu slumber party. "

You don't tell her that you _miss _her because that would be weird and you really not interest in being made a mockery of right now. You don't say you were worried either but you kinda were so you settle on shrugging as gawkily as possible as Jade stares at you.

"Why? Did you miss me?" She teases with a sharp smile and you fight off a blush and the lingering suspicion that Jade can see into your brain parts to scoff at her.

"Uh, _no_. I just couldn't help but notice you haven't been around lately. Especially since its been days since anyone insulted me for no reason."

"You're a talent less hack. Feel better?" Jade offers and you roll your eyes.

"Jade, c'mon…"

" Look," She sighs, slouching down in her chair. _"_I don't want to crash the party. I can only take so much awkward in one sitting and besides, uncomfortable situations make Cat vomit."

"Jade, its not awkward," You start with a wince. "I mean, its not _that _awkward."

"Right, because hanging out with my ex boyfriend, the girl I watched him almost kiss and other assorted people who don't really want to hang out with me, is the epitome of a 'not awkward' situation." She says with the most aggressive air quotes you've ever seen.

"Why do you think we don't want to hang out with you?" You wonder softly and Jade rolls her eyes now, using her heels to swivel back and forth in her chair just a little before doing a full turn.

"Haven't you heard?" Jade asks as you watch her spin and spin in her chair. She stops slowly, tipping her head to back to gaze up at you and you shift awkwardly, tighten your fingers on the strap of your bag. "I'm a gank."

You wince, shaking your head as Jade starts turning again, smooth and deliberate but still somehow dizzying. "No, you're not…you're just…"

"Tori." Jade laughs and the sound is sharp and bitter as she stills in front of you again. "It's fine. See, this funny thing happens when couples break up. Their friends have to choose sides and it looks like all of my _friends _have pledged their allegiance to Beck. Apparently being warm and nice and, like, caring earns you friendship. Who knew?"

"We're still your friends, though." You tell her, probably too earnestly and Jade just shakes her head and twists until you're staring at her back. "I mean, I'm still your friend. And I'm sure the gang feels the same way. Yeah, you put on a good act but I know you care about us. "

You watch her head drop, watch her push her hair back with both hands and you suddenly wish you could see her face, her eyes. You lean down, setting your bag down by the door before crossing the room in tentative strides.

"What were you singing just now?" You wonder cautiously, almost expecting the verbal decapitation that doesn't come. "Because it sounded really great."

"A song." Jade huffs and you step closer as her shoulders rise then fall with the oxygen in her lungs. You have the sudden urge to press your palm between her shoulder blades just to feel the air rustling in her chest but you realize the urge is both the quickest way to a maiming and _weird _so you stuff your hands deep inside your back pockets.

"Duh." You offer and Jade turns lazily to face you, whatever emotion that made her turn away from you has been wrangled and wrestled and now she only arches a studded brow at you while her face settles into a mask that could possibly be boredom. You don't think it is though. "What's it called?"

She sighs, long suffering and exaggerated in a way that makes you almost turn and leave but then she smiles just a little bit, the corners of her mouth curling and just like that you've grown roots. "Fade into You by Mazzy Star."

"I've never heard of them." You admit, sitting in the only other chair in the small room. It creaks with your movements and you dig your heels into the ground when it rolls forward towards Jade just a little bit.

"Somehow it doesn't surprise me that Pop Princess, Tori Vega, doesn't know much beyond Ginger Fox and Ke$ha." Jade bites out in this strange tone that you know is supposed to be harsh but just isn't.

"I know things!" You squawk indignantly and Jade turns a little bit in her chair.

"Oh, I'm sure you do Tori Vega." She hisses like a tease and you swallow, shifting uncomfortably.

"Well, are they good?" You ask stupidly and Jade slumps in her chair, hips jutting forward and hair falling over her shoulders as she exams the chipped polish on her nails. Her boot nudges your sneaker and those roots keep you from wheeling away from her.

"They're great." She says simply and you nod, glancing at the door before focusing on Jade and Jade's furrowed brow.

"Could you maybe sing some more?" You ask cautiously because Jade's voice is still ringing in your ears. And you've known Jade was talented. You've seen her act in various plays and sing a couple different songs but that was something different and spellbinding and _pure _in a way that makes you want to hear more.

Jade eyes you for a moment and you give her your best smile, your eyebrows nearly meeting your hairline. "Why're you doing this?"

"You have an amazing voice, Jade. I-"

"No." She cuts you off easily and you blink at her. "Why're you being so nice to me? I mean, I am unpleasant to you on a regular basis and you're always so…"

"I don't know." You sigh because she's right and if you did hate Jade it would make a lot more sense but you're staring at her bright blue eyes and all you really want, besides a record contract and worldwide fame, is for Jade to like you just a little bit. "I don't really know. I can't help it, I guess. Can…can you just sing?"

Jade straightens in her seat carefully, leaning over to a nearby table and picking up a tambourine that jangles happily in her hands.

"Here." She grunts, tossing it to you and you catch it against your knees noisily. "Keep up."

The tambourine bangs against the heel of your hand and you watch Jades lips part and throat work as her rich voice fills the room again while she declares **_I think it's strange you never knew._**

* * *

Realistically, you know that everyone-Beck, Andre, Robbie, Cat and Jade- were all friends long before you arrived at Hollywood Arts. You're not narcissistic enough to think that you were the one to bring them together. Besides, you've seen the picture of Robbie and Andre in junior high school that Beck keeps in his locker for blackmailing purposes. You've also seen the Halloween gram with 'Don't die in your sleep' scrawled almost lovingly across the front from 10 year-old Jade that Cat keeps pinned to the corkboard above her desk.

But, for a while and heck even now sometimes, you had no idea why five semi-normal, mostly sane, good natured people would be friends with the likes of Jade West. Jade, whose hobbies include fondling sharp objects, terrorizing human beings and basking in the unhappiness of others. You didn't understand why Beck put up with her scathing remarks and why Cat ignored her threats. Or why Robbie just accepted the violent puppet abuse and Andre forgave her for her habit of publicly humiliating him.

You get it now.

You get why Robbie is constantly trying to get on Jade's good side and why Cat is constantly fluttering about the other girl. Why Andre still gets that look in his eyes sometimes even though he _swears _he doesn't have a crush on Jade anymore and why Beck will always, _always _go chasing after her.

You can't explain it but you _get _it now and you're just as bad as they are.

And that understanding is what fuels a full blown tirade in the halls of Hollywood Arts.

You corner Cat, Andre and Robbie after school and you're _yelling. _Because they're supposed to be Jade's friends and they can't just choose _sides _like that. Because Jade will never admit it but she's _sad _and _invisible _and how could they do that to Jade.

You poked Andre in the chest over and over and reminded him how many songs Jade helped him write and you gripped Robbie by his shirt and shook him as hard as you could because Jade _puppet sits _for him when his family goes out of town and bans Rex. You don't touch Cat but you remind her that she and Jade are supposed to be _best friends_. In the end you declare them all _suckish _before turning around and stomping away.

It's hours later when your cell phone buzzes on the coffee table. You've been ignoring Andre's calls and texts all afternoon and you expect it to be another from him but instead it's a text from Jade.

**Jade: What did you do?**

It reads and you blink at it for a couple of seconds before sending her back a question mark. You're phone buzzes immediately and you're a weird mix of terrified and curious when Jade sends.

**Jade: Come over. Now!**

It takes you nearly twenty minutes for you to convince Trina to give you a ride and then your half climbing out the car, half getting shoved into the street by Trina's foot. You stumble up to the front door of Jade's house, which you've never actually been inside and reach for the bell.

The door swings open before you can even press it though and you yelp as Jade drags you into the house by the front of your shirt.

"What're you doing?" You cry and Jade looks at you with wide eyes.

"What am I doing? What am _I_ doing?" She cries and suddenly you realize there are other people in the house. You can hear Cat and Robbie talking and then Andre's laughter and you can't help but smile a little bit. "I've been invaded!"

Just then Cat wanders around the corner, clutching a bowl of popcorn. "Yay! Tori's here!" She squeals, hurtling over to give you a hug. "We're having a sleepover!"

Jade stares at you with hard eyes and you give her your best smile as Cat snags your wrists and begins pulling you towards the living room of the surprisingly normal house.

* * *

"I've never…" You mutter, glancing down at the cup in your hand and Andre throws a heavy arm around your shoulders.

"Just drink real slow." He laughs, steering you back towards the living room where everyone is gathered around the television and what looks to be a recording of a play is playing on the television screen. "We're all gonna crash here tonight so there's nothing to worry about. Just have a good time."

You nod, taking a drink from your cup and wincing a little at the burn of alcohol that cola doesn't quite mask before sitting down on the couch between Cat and Robbie. You're not exactly sure when everyone agreed to Jade's assertion that if everyone insisted on not getting out of her house and continuing to violate her human rights than there needed to be alcohol involved but now you're drinking fancy liquor out of her parents cabinet like its no big deal. "What're we watching?"

"Jade!" Cat yells happily, leaning down to wrap her arms around Jade where she sits on the floor in front of the couch and you almost expect her to snap Cat's limbs clean off her body. Instead she makes a face that's half grimace and half smile as Cat squeezes, reaching up to pat Cat's head.

"Relax Baby Girl, we've already seen this before. You guys were even at the show." Jade laughs a little.

"C'mon Jade, you are really great in this." Robbie pipes up beside you before pressing his cup to his lips.

"Of course I am." Jade kind of sneers with far less bite than you're used to.

"Always so humble." Robbie mutters.

"What is this?" You wonder aloud and there's a collective gasp among the group that startles you.

"You've never seen Wicked?" Jade asks, tipping her head back to look up at you coolly and you glance around at everyone else's shocked faces.

"Well…no." You mutter, taking a drink from your cup and Cat squeaks indignantly beside you.

"It's a musical based on this book about the witches of Oz." Robbie offers with a half smile, " It's really famous."

"And Jade played Elphaba." Cat giggles behind her hands. "The Wicked Witch of the West. They painted her green!"

"It was just a small production for my theater troupe." Jade says dismissively, looking down at her black fingernails.

"She rocked it." Andre laughs and Jade blushes, the blood bright red beneath her pale skin.

There's more lots of laughing and yelling for a moment then suddenly a voice is filling the living room and you all stop to turn to the screen as Jade sings. Cat squeals quietly and you barely register it as you stare slack jawed at the screen.

You've never really heard Jade sing, not like this. Her voice is broad and full and amazing in a way that is unfamiliar and you just know everyone else is staring at you, except for Jade who is probably smirking, while you experience it.

* * *

**_Been up all night_**

**_Staring at you_**

**_Wondering what's on your mind_**

Robbie's voice cracks a little bit as he stretches it high and thin while Jade's voice swoops low and you grin a little bit at the sound they make as you turn the corner into the wide, open kitchen. Your cup is sweating in your hand and you've already forgotten what Andre requested from the fridge but you ignore your wet palm and Andre's call from the living room for you to not forget the French onion dip as you watch Robbie pull a chuckling Jade through a clumsy waltz around the kitchen.

**_I've been this way_**

**_With so many before_**

**_But this feels like the first time_**

They move clumsily, bumping into everything possible as their voices meld and dance better than they're managing with their bodies. Robbie spins them over and over and Jade wraps both arms around his narrow shoulders. For a moment they're nothing but a blur, a smear under the fluorescent kitchen lights.

**_You want the sunrise To go back to bed_**

**_I want to make you laugh_**

**_Mess up my bed with me_**

**_Kick off the covers_**

**_I'm waiting_**

They're laughing the lyrics but even that is harmonized in a way that makes your stomach flutter like just swallowed a handful of butterflies. You shake your head at the disgusting picture you've just painted in your head, pressing your dry hand to your stomach absently as Robbie dips Jade dramatically and her leg extends even as they nearly crash to the ground.

**_Every word you say I think_**

**_I should write down_**

**_I don't want to forget_**

**_Come daylight_**

She laughs the words as they straighten into an upright position, burying her face against Robbie's neck while he rocks her gently. You're still standing there with, what you're absolutely positive, is a dopey look on your face when Jade peeks at you over Robbie's shoulder. She arches an eyebrow in your direction and you lift your hand in an silly, uncoordinated wave before heading to the refrigerator on wobbly legs. You pull out the dip and shut the door with your hip before heading back to the living room. You glance over your shoulder once to find Jade watching you, blue eyes crystalline while Robbie sings _Happy to lay here. Just happy to be here. I'm happy to know you._

You flop down onto the couch beside Andre, handing him his dip before leaning your head back to stare up at the ceiling. "I think I'm drunk."

Andre laughs beside you and the sound makes you smile even as the room tips and tilts a bit. Your arms and legs feel loose, like your joints are made out of gelatin and that thought only makes you laugh harder.

"Probably." Andre says as you lift your head to stare at Cat across the room where she has a hand up Rex and is making him speak in the worst Jamaican accent ever, "You feel okay, though?"

You shrug, blinking at Cat. "Jade's kinda, like, great…ya know?" You giggle and Andre just shakes his head and thrusts a bag of chips towards you.

"Eat some chips, Tori."

* * *

You're dying. You just know it.

The bathroom door opens and hits you in the leg.

"Call 911." You croak from where your sprawled on the pristine white tile, your cheek pressed to the cool ground while everything spins and spins.

"Tori." Jade laughs your name softly and you pry your eyes open enough to stare at her socked feet.

"I'm dying. Call 911." You groan as everything spins and dips like its not supposed to and Jade drops down smoothly next to your limp body. "Call the mayor."

"You're not dying. You're drunk." She points out helpfully and maybe she's right but right now it feels like the same thing. You blink at Jade as she leans back against the wall, watch her multiply to three before merging back into one. "Very, very drunk and I don't think there's anything the mayor can do about that."

You can hear the strum of a guitar in the other room and the sound seems far away in the closed up bathroom but you listen to Robbie warn:

**_Children, Broadripple is burning_**

**_And the girls are getting sick_**

**_Off huffing glue up in the bathroom_**

**_While your boyfriends pick up chicks_**

"This is your own fault, ya know." She smiles, hair falling limply in her face and eyes glossy and she looks _touchable _and _knowable _and when you blurt the words she just shakes her head. "You're speaking nonsense."

"Are you sure I'm not dying?" You wonder and Jade rolls her eye and scoots closer, threads her fingers through your hair and tugs a little too hard.

"I'm pretty sure." she hums when you wince before tucking your hair behind your ear. "Ya know, for your first time drinking, you've outdone yourself."

"It was fun." You laugh stupidly. "I don't think I knew you before but I'm starting to know you now and its fun."

Jade laughs and you like the way the sound works its way up her throat. "Listening to you babble drunkenly is pretty entertaining too."

"I'm not babbling." You argue even as your stomach rolls in that unpleasant way that usually signals the impending arrival of vomit. "I'm telling you secrets."

"You are?" Jade is smiling now and you grin back.

"Yeah, now you tell me one." You demand and Jade bites her lip. "Tell me something that no one else knows."

There's a few moments where Jade is just legitimately giggling and it's probably the most endearing thing your brain has ever processed in this moment.

"I have an audition. A big one. In New York." She finally says and your head jerks up too, too fast.

"No way!" You yelp then immediately regret it as your vision swims. "Oh gosh."

Jade does that low, soft giggle again and you close your eyes and listen to her get up. The faucet turns on for a second and you think of roaring rapids and drowning before it turns off and Jade is right beside you now.

You jump a little as cold, wet fingers touch your neck.

"What's it for? Your big audition, I mean?" You ask as she skims over your throat with a damp palm. You swallow and you know she feels it.

"A musical. It's no big deal but no one really knows." Jade says easily and you open your eyes and stare at her.

"Wow." You croak because that is _so_ a _huge_ deal and Jade lifts a shoulder in a lazy shrug. "Can I help you practice?"

You kind of expected her to laugh at you and tell you no but she just smirks at your slurred request and rolls her eyes. "Sure Vega."

Her wet fingers trace along your hairline and you watch her brow bend in concentration, closing your eyes when her fingertips brush over your eyebrows.

"So, thanks or whatever." She murmurs, words tripping over one another and you blink up at her in surprise.

"For what?" You mumble as she traces over your face, leaving a wet streak down the bridge of your nose and over your cheekbones. "I didn't…"

"For tonight." She cuts you off, bright eyes meeting yours and you shrug the best you can on the hard linoleum. "You've been more or less stalking me lately which means you've pretty much been there whenever I needed a…someone."

"A friend." You correct for her with a sloppy grin. "You can say it. It wont kill you."

There's a beat of silence where Robbie's voice, now accompanied with Cat's, echoes in the space the two of you are occupying.

**_And don't fucking move'_**

**_Cause everything you think you have will go to shit_**

**_But we've got a lot_**

**_Don't you dare forget that_**

They pause, a funny note ringing out from the guitar and then Cat is giggling.

"Fine." Jade huffs, pulling her cool, dripping fingers away from your skin. "You're a good friend but for the record, I'm pretty drunk so not accountable for the things I say."

"Yay." You murmur anyway, shutting your eyes again as nausea surges like a tide in your stomach. "Do friends forgive friends that puke on them? Just out of curiosity."

"No." Jade answers swiftly and you nod a little bit.

"Okey dokey." You swallow hard before looking up at her again. It's dumb and stupid but you want to look at her all night. You also want to go back in time and not drink that third alcoholic beverage.

You're still staring at her, you realize, when she tips her head to meet your gaze. Color high in her cheeks and limbs uncharacteristically loose.

"What're you looking at Tori Vega?." she whispers quietly just as the singing from the living room starts again.

**_And I'm wasted_**

**_You can taste it_**

**_Don't look at me that way_**

"You." You admit. "You, I guess."

* * *

Eventually the five of you spread sleeping bags out on the living room floor, nesting together like ferrets or something and you watch drowsily as Jade and Andre work together over Robbie's snoring form to put his limp hand in a bowl of warm water.

"He's gonna pee." Cat murmurs softly beside you in her bright pink sleeping bag. "He always pees."

You blink at Jade and Andre laughing quietly before abandoning Robbie to marinate in his own urine before Andre drops down beside you and Jade on his other side. Your so tired and drunk and also _tired _but Andre and Jade are still giggling and you turn your head to watch the battle of thumb wars they're engaged in.

It surprises you that the two most mature teenagers you know are like little kids when they get around one another.

"Last time they covered Robbie in toothpaste." Cat says and you laugh, closing your eyes as the room dances. "Jade hates you but only because she doesn't really hate you."

You stop laughing at that, licking your dry lips as sleep starts to sweep over you, starting at your feet and working its way up. "She says we're kind of like friends now."

"Yay." Cat cries softly and your mouth twitches up in a smile before you loose complete consciousness.


	3. Chapter 3

So, your shirt is stuck in your locker.

You're trying not to bring attention to it but, the chances of you dying right here in this hallway with the tail of your shirt closed in your locker are very high right now. You've pretty much accepted your fate by the time Beck appears around the corner, approaching you with a half smile.

"What's up?" He greets as you lean casually against your locker but his eyes narrow in suspicion almost immediately.

"Oh, ya know, nothing." You laugh awkwardly, resting your head in your palm. "Just _making it shine_."

"Stuck in your locker again?" Beck asks smoothly and you frown, leaning forward and swatting at the back of your shirt.

"Yeah and I don't know why it keeps happening." You whine helplessly and Beck chuckles, walking over to your locker and punching the door once. It immediately pops opens and your sure you would've ended up face first on the linoleum if it weren't for his strong arms around your waist. "Thanks."

"No problem. Damsels in distress are my specialty." He chuckles and you wonder absently if lines like that really work on girls, if they worked on Jade. "So…"

"So?" You straighten your shirt absently before turning to close your locker.

"So, rumor has it that the gang had a sleepover the other night." Beck whispers conspiratorially. "And Fun-Time Juice was involved."

"Who told you that?" You ask warily, narrowing your eyes.

"Rex."

"Aw man. That puppet can never keep his mouth shut." You groan, "Look, we all just wanted to hang out with Jade. She's been-"

"Hey, hey, hey. No need to explain." He says, waving away your details. "I get it."

"So, you're not mad we had fun without you?" You wonder and he shrugs, running a hand through his hair.

"I mean, I know how Jade can get after stuff like this." He says after a moment, glancing down the hall and you follow his gaze to where Jade is watching in quiet amusement as Cat bounces around her excitedly. "She draws in on herself and I'm just glad she has you guys."

"Aw, you still care about her." You coo and Beck chuckles, eyes still focused on Jade.

"I'm still in love with her." He says easily and you blink at him in shock.

"Really?"

"Yeah, definitely." He sighs, focusing on you again. "We were together forever. Feelings like that don't just go away."

That makes sense. You've had a very long, very complicated relationship with Peppy Cola even though you gave it up years ago so you get where Beck is coming from…sorta

"I miss her a lot." He's staring at Jade again but now Jade is staring too and you feel vaguely uncomfortable. A feeling that only grows when Jade's eyes track over to you so you immediately look up at the ceiling with sudden fascination. It doesn't matter though because you can tell she's walking over thanks to the click clack of her boots and the skittering of Cat's heels as she skips along.

"Well. Well. Well. What's going on here?" She asks smoothly and you drop your head to smile at her tightly.

"Oh, hey! I didn't even see you there." You lie awkwardly but Jade's focused on Beck. "Me and Beck were just discussing school…and learning…educational systems."

"How're you doing Jade?" Beck wonders, ignoring you and adjusting his bag on his shoulder while Jade regards him coolly even as people in the halls turn and stare.

"I'm fantastic. How about you." She's grinning severely and you frown. "How've you been?"

"Good." Beck huffs and there's more staring and your mind is desperately trying to figure out a nonchalant way to get the hell out of there.

"This is awkward." Cat laughs then grimaces, a hand pressing to her stomach. "My tummy feels funny."

Thankfully, the bell rings then, saving you all.

"Go to class Cat." Jade says and Cat shrugs.

" 'Kay 'kay." And then she's scurrying away into the sea of students and you watch her go longingly.

"So, I'll catch you later." Beck mutters and Jade looks bored.

"Yeah, whatever." She nearly yawns and then Beck is leaving too. You don't think you're supposed to see the way Jade watches him go.

After a long moment that you spend fiddling with your backpack and not running away even though you _really _want to, Jade turns to you expectantly. "C'mon."

You glance up and down the thinning halls as Jade tugs you towards the front doors. Hollywood Arts is sort of irresponsibly carefree about a lot of their policies, including the one that says you're not actually allowed to leave school grounds when you're supposed to be in class. Which means Jade pulls you towards the parking lot without any resistance from any sort of security guard or authority figure.

"Where are we going?" You wonder, glancing over your shoulder as Jade release your wrist and you immediately grip the place her fingers were, rubbing absently. "We're going to miss Sikowitz's class."

"Dude, get with the program." Jade sighs in annoyance and you feel inexplicably stupid. "We're ditching."

"We're what?!" You squeal, stopping dead in your tracks in the middle of the blacktop. "I can't ditch!"

Jade rolls her eyes as she circles on you warily, "Goodness no. I'm sweet, precious Tori Vega and I wouldn't _dream _of breaking the rules."

Jade mocks you in that syrupy sweet voice that grates your nerves. "I don't sound like that!"

"Look." Jade sighs after a moment, glancing around the parking lot before fixing you with a look that pins you in this moment. "Beck is staring at me which means other people are staring too. Like we're animals in some sort of zoo waiting for us to either kill each other or start mating and I just need to get out of there."

"But…" You start dumbly, "But you're Jade 'Fucking' West. HBIC."

"Two things." Jade starts with a frown, eyebrows knitting together. "First, listening to you curse makes me feel all tingly. Keep it up. And second, Jade 'Fucking' West? HBIC? Really?! Like, where did you even come up with that? Is that what people honestly call me? Because that's _really _stupid."

"You're missing the point!" You sputter even as you blush bright red. "Like it or not, you _are _Jade West and people care too much about your life. I mean, people have been watching you for as long as I can remember."

"Well, maybe I don't feel like being on display today." She exhales quietly, shaking her head a bit. Then you're watching her roll her shoulders back, straightening her spine and sealing the cracks in her wall that you hadn't realized were split open until this very moment. "Whatever, go to class. I'm leaving."

She turns on her heel, heading towards her car with her keys in her hand and then you're reaching out and curling your finger around her wrist because you can't stand to watch her walk away or to watch the gaps in her walls close up. "Jade, wait."

"What?" She spits, glancing at you over her shoulder and you smile a little bit, nervous and something else that makes the corner of your mouth twitch.

"Just…Where are we going?"

"I need coffee." Is all she says and you release her wrist reluctantly but follow close behind.

{{{ }}}

You kind of thought that when Jade said she needed coffee that you guys would end up in one of the trillion Starbucks around the school but that would be too easy and if there's one thing Jade West isn't its easy. So, you stay quiet as she hops on the freeway and follow signs for Santa Monica.

The coffee shop is practically on the beach. Its small and artsy with writing scrolled on every available surface and a jukebox in the corner. It smells like coffee and beach simultaneously and you inhale carefully as you guys join the line to order.

"How did you find this place?" You wonder, glancing around while trying in vain to shake some sand out of your boot.

"Me and Beck use to come here all the time." She grunts and you nod glancing around the place. You can't help but notice a tall, attractive guy watching the two of you for a moment before standing and heading over.

You've already mentally prepared a nice, gentle rejection when he smiles at you but he turns away just as you open your mouth to tell him that you're flattered but currently spending time with your _friend_.

"It would be really forward of me if I said you were beautiful, wouldn't it?" He says to Jade who turns to give him a lazy once over.

"Yeah and lame. Really lame." She says after a moment before turning back around and he nods, glancing at you with a half smile.

"Then I am definitely not saying that. In fact, I came all the way over here to inform you that you, ma'am, are hideous."

He has Jade's interest instantly and she whirls around to face him slowly.

"You're pretty ugly too."

"So, can I buy you a coffee? Considering how unattractive we both are?" He asks and Jade arches a slow eyebrow, a smile teasing the corners of her mouth and all you can think about as you stand beside her is Beck's admission this morning and the out of place feeling that is currently pushing outwards against your ribs.

"What if I don't want coffee?" Jade challenges, biting down on the amusement playing at her mouth and this boy with sandy hair that's that really great kind of messy and a perpetual knit in his brow that smoothes away when he smiles, just steps closer to Jade like he wants all of her attention, like he deserves it. "What if I want tea or hot chocolate? Maybe just water?"

"No, you're a coffee girl." He says like he knows and you roll your eyes and cross your arms over your stomach.

"Oh, you think so?"

" Yeah, I don't think I've ever seen you around school without a coffee cup in your hand." He says easily, hands shoved into the shallow pockets of his slim jeans. He's wearing a soft, worn tee shirt and leather loafers and looks like he fell right out of an H&M ad.

"How come your not in school right now?" You frown and you are promptly ignored by Jade and this boy. "Does everyone come here or something?"

"Stalker." Jade accuses quietly and he smiles, revealing a small, disgustingly charming gap between his front teeth.

"Maybe, a little." His smile broadens. "So, are you gonna let me spend money on you or…"

"What if someone else is already buying me coffee." Jade wonders, glancing at you pointedly and you smile awkwardly as he follows her gaze. He laughs a little, giving you a nod of his head before focusing on Jade again.

"You, Jade West, have a severe caffeine problem. I'm willing to wait until you need another fix and when that time comes, hopefully your friend will be willing to let me buy you a drink." He says easily, rocking back on his heels and Jade's teeth sink into her bottom lip.

All of this flirting is literally making you nauseas so when the line shifts forward and the barista asks for your order you clear your throat pointedly. "I will have one of your chai-est lattes and my friend will have…"

You trail off and glance at Jade expectantly while she proceeds to ignore you.

"So, what's your name Money Bags?" Jade asks with a smirk pulling at her mouth.

"Lennon." He says and he doesn't even attempt to shake Jade's hand, just runs his fingers through the front of his hair.

"Like the Russian Marxists?" Jade grins and Lennon chuckles.

"Like the legendary singer-songwriter." He corrects, hazel eyes focusing on you suddenly. "And it looks like your friend, along with the people in line behind us, are awaiting your order with baited breath."

"Coffee. Black." Jade says without even looking at you and you roll your eyes.

Lennon lets out a vaguely triumphant chuckle, "Until next time, Jade."

"Whatever." Jade says all breathy and _girly _and you roll your eyes again, turning to finish giving the barista your order as Lennon walks away with a glance over his shoulder.

"What was that?" You chuckle uneasily as Jade wanders back to your side, glancing around in time to catch the look Jade shares with Lennon over your head. "I mean…like, what was that?"

"He looks like James Dean." Jade murmurs as an explanation and you gape in a way your sure is definitely attractive before she shrugs and ambles over to an empty table.

You follow her, crashing down in the chair across from her before pointing an accusatory finger across the table. "You were _flirting_! You were flirting with that man-boy! I've never seen you flirt! It was like seeing an elephant snowboard or something! For some reason it gave me indigestion though…"

Jade leans forward to snap at your still extended index finger with her teeth and you jerk your hand to your chest with a gasp. "Relax Tori, its just flirting."

"But it seemed like he really liked you." You point out and Jade arches an eyebrow.

"Don't sound so surprised." She grunts. "Some people do actually like me."

The waitress chooses then to bring you guys your drinks and you smile your thanks before focusing on Jade who's already watching you burn your tongue on your chai latte.

"C'mon. I know there's plenty of people that enjoy your incredibly morose sensibility." You offer and Jade rolls her eyes but smiles in this way that's so _genuine _that something in your brain literally stalls, your cup hovering near your mouth for too long and scorching your palm.

"You okay there?" Jade wonders and you nod, clearing your throat and setting down your cup. "So, uhm, speaking of flirting. Has Beck finally asked you out so you guys can make vaguely middle-eastern looking children yet?"

Her words are airy and carefree but her eyes focus on the pattern on the tabletop before she pushes her coffee cup against her mouth. Your stomach sinks a little at the way her voice sounds.

"No. I mean, I made it very clear that I wasn't interested." You say clearly, practically screaming it across the small coffee shop.

"I was kinda there, remember? So, ya know, no need to yell." Jade mumbles, glancing at the few people scattered around you. "But…So, he hasn't."

"No. No." You whisper and Jade nods, tapping her thumb against the rim of the cup. "And even if he did I would never ever do that to you since we're friends and all."

Jade just nods again quietly and you shrug. "He, uhm, actually asked about you this morning. I think he misses you or something."

Jade lifts her eyes at that, looking at you wordlessly with her insanely blue eyes. You shift uncomfortably under her gaze for a second before pushing to your feet. "I'm gonna go play something on the jukebox."

You nod, heading across the shop to the jukebox. You dig some quarters out of your pocket and drop them in before punching the buttons. You don't recognize any of the songs offered save for one Ginger Fox that you're pretty sure is only for irony, not for actual playing. You shrug, pressing B-19 because you like the name of the song. A male voice immediately creeps from the speakers all around the café, soft and sincere and nearly unintelligible.

_**She may contain the urge to run awayBut hold her down with soggy clothes and breezeblocksCitrezene your fever's gripped me againNever kisses all you ever send are fullstops **_

Then the faint strum of the guitar builds into something steady and gains the soft tinkle of a piano and a chaotic drum beat as you walk back to Jade.

You sit gingerly, cupping your hands around your warm coffee cup and tasting the burn on the tip of your tongue then Jade is looking at you with eyes that remind you of dying stars in space while the song wonders: _**Do you know where the wild things go?**_

{{{ }}}

"What's good Robin Hood?" Andre greets as he walks through your front door and you look up from the couch as he heads straight for your kitchen.

"Are you greeting me or my food?" You laugh as he pulls out a bowl of grapes from the refrigerator before heading back towards you.

"The food." Andre shrugs, dropping down beside you. "But also you. Whats up? You ditch today?"

You pick up the remote and flip off Celebrities Underwater before tucking your legs underneath you and facing Andre. "Yeah. Jade took me to this awesome coffee place in Santa Monica and then we hung out on the pier for a while."

"You hung out with Jade West?" Andre chokes around a grape. "And she brought you home alive instead of leaving you swimming with the fishes?"

"I know its weird but Jade is cool when she's not being all homicidal." You defend even as Andre continues to skeptically eyeball you.

"Are you in danger Tori?" Andre whispers, glancing around your living room and you roll your eyes at him. "Blink once for yes and twice for no."

"Andre!" you laugh. "I'm fine and Jade really is cool."

Andre chuckles as you whack him on the shoulder. "Hey, I already know. Me and Jade get each other. In fact, she's gonna help me shop for clothes for my gig next weekend."

"Really?"

"Yeah, Jade's got great style." Andre nods, stuffing his mouth again. "So, you guys been hanging out a lot?"

"Not a lot." You shrug, stealing a few grapes. "Just more."

"It's good that you guys are finally acting like friends." Andre says. "Now turn the TV back on. I want to see if David Schwimmer drowns."

{{{ }}}

It's 3AM and there are footsteps on the stairs.

You're huddled under your blanket as your bedroom door creaks open, a scream loud enough to wake up the neighborhood building in your chest.

"Don't scream." Jade drawls as she shuts your bedroom door like she didn't just scare the crap out of you. "It's me."

You manage to choke down your cry of pure fear and tug your blanket from over your head as Jade ambles across your bedroom. "Is that supposed to make me feel better?!"

"It's not my fault your house is ridiculously easy to break into." She says, smiling at you brightly when you lean over and flip on your bedside lamp. She's wearing these tiny shorts and an oversized sweatshirt with sleeves that hang over her hands and you smile a little at that even though it still feels like your heart will break past your ribs at any second. "Also, someone breaks into your house and you hide under a blanket?"

"What're you doing her? Besides giving out free heart attacks." You sigh, pressing the heel of your hand to your chest as you watch her walk closer before face planting gracefully onto your bed with a groan.

"You said you'd help me." She says loudly against the mattress and you blink absently at the pale length of her legs.

"Help you what?" You wonder, flopping back against your pillows and shutting your eyes and saving yourself from a late night eye gouging. "What could you possibly need help with at this hour?"

"With my audition." She mumbles before turning her head and you can feel her peering up at you from where she's lying with her head near your shoulder. "That night you got totally wasted you said you wanted to help me."

You have very vague memories of the conversation but you shake your head. "Jade…"

"You also said you wanted to _touch _me." Jade whispers. "That you wanted to _know _me."

Your face flushes bright red and your eyes fly open. "Okay! Alright! I'll help you just-just shut up."

"You're not the boss of me." She mumbles, stretching her arms over her head until her hands disappear under a pillow.

"You know, that night _you _called _me _a good friend." You point out and Jade glares at you.

"Shut up." She hisses glancing around like she's afraid there's an audience.

"Do you have anything in particular that you want to perform?" You sigh, rubbing your hands against your eyes and when you look at Jade again, she's already watching you. "What?"

"Nothing. You just look awful right now." She shrugs and you squawk indignantly.

"It's three in the morning!" You hiss, reaching up to run your fingers through your hair. "Can you just not-"

"I have a couple things I want to do but I can't get the stupid monologue from 10 Things I Hate About You out of my head." She exhales the hard, rolling onto her back and pulling your pillow over her face. You watch her chest rise as she breathes in deeply.

"So do that." You say and Jade lifts the pillow to arch her brow at you.

"Are you kidding me? This might be the biggest audition of my career. I'm not doing some cheesy piece from a teen rom-com." She scoffs and the strange mix of embarrassment and anger that only she seems to be able to invoke floods your chest. "Don't be stupid."

"Just do it!" You hiss and Jade rolls her eyes dramatically before flipping over onto her stomach again and your eyes trail down to her legs again, at her sneakers floating absently as she kicks her legs back and forth.

"Don't tell me what to do." She spits back at you and you have a really, _really _strong urge to just go back to sleep because its nearly four in the morning and your arguing with Jade West in your bed after _she _broke into _your _house and asked _you _for help. But Jade gives a long suffering sigh before clearing her throat. "But for the record, this will _not _be my audition piece."

"Fine. But its good practice." You point out, watching Jade push herself up into a cross legged position in the middle of your bed.

"Don't you think I know that?" She grunts but her words lack her usual but increasingly less frequent venom. You stare as her eyes flutter closed and she licks her lips slowly and then she looks at you and your startled.

Her eyes are bright and honest and _hurt _and you swallow and sit up against the headboard a little more.

"I hate the way you talk to me. And the way you cut your hair." She starts easily, eyes focused on you like you're the most annoying thing she's ever come in contact with. You realize that you haven't seen that look on her face in a while. "I hate the way you drive my car. I hate it when you stare.

"I hate your big dumb combat boots. And the way you read my mind." you smile a little bit even as Jade takes a deep breath, like the words are sticking in her throat while her eyes soften. "I hate you so much it makes me sick-It even makes me rhyme."

Then Jade's voice thickens and her eyes glisten and that faint smile curling your lips evaporates as she croaks the next lines. "I hate the way you're always right. I hate it when you lie. I hate it when you make me laugh - even worse when you make me cry."

She looks away for a moment, squeezing her eyes shut against the tears or maybe to gather more but from your perspective it reads as emotion, rushing and inescapable and you shift forward some as your skin prickles. "I hate it that you're not around. And the fact that you didn't call."

Her eyes lift to yours again, shining blue while these beautiful, fat tears roll down her cheeks and your hands clench at the bedding stupidly as she finishes in a tight, broken voice. "But mostly I hate the way I don't hate you...not even close, not even a little bit, not even at all."

There's a beat of silence where you're just gaping at Jade because you've always known that Jade is talented but you realize in this moment that high school musicals aren't really doing her justice.

"Jade! That-that was amazing!" You finally sputter after what feels like years and Jade blinks once, hard, and then she's smirking. She's Jade again, just like that. The wounded girl who just spoke those words is already tucked away somewhere and the Jade you recognize is wiping at her eyes with a snort.

"Keep your pants on, Vega." She says and you flush suddenly, leaning away from her again. "It's just acting. I mean, phenomenal acting but acting nonetheless."

"My pants are _very _secure, thank you very much." You point out, slumping against the pillows again. "And if you're so aware of how phenomenal your acting is, what're you doing here?"

"I'm always looking to improve my acting and open to a little constructive criticism." She shrugs, glancing at her nails pointedly and you release a disbelieving grumble that makes her roll her eyes. "And I may or may not be freaking out about this audition."

"Jade, you're gonna do great." You point out and Jade just looks at you in a way that's unnerving mostly because you have no idea what she's thinking.

"How do you know?" She finally asks and you shrug.

"You're really talented."

"Oh," she _moans _and your eyes widen. "Say that again. It gets me all excited to hear that come out of your pretty mouth."

"Oh my god." You groan, leaning over to turn off the lamp before shuffling down into bed. "Go to sleep."

"Who says I'm sharing a bed with you again? You've got wandering hands and I dunno if I'm up for getting groped all night long. Again." Jade says into the darkness and you close your eyes, rolling so your back is facing her.

"Okay, then bye. Lock the door on the way out." You mutter, tucking your blanket under your chin. There's silence for a long moment that's broken by the sound of shoes being dropped over the edge of the bed.

"What happen to the girl that insisted I spend the night because she was terrified I'd get kidnapped?" Jade sneers even as she lays herself out beside you, on top of the blanket. "I kinda liked her."

"She's sleeping." You mumble and Jade is quiet and solid beside you. You're not going back to sleep, because Jade's wide awake next to you and who knows what she'd do to you! Though, she's already proven to be able to control herself and not murder you in your sleep but still, your stomach feels fluttery.

"Most people only get one chance, ya know?" Jade starts quietly as you stare blindly into the pitch black of your room. "To make it big. To be something. What if I-I mean…I can't screw this up."

You turn over slowly, staring at Jade's profile. "You wont."

"You don't know that."

"Yes. I do." You whisper. "Jade, have you met you?"

She laughs a little bit at that and you smile at the sound. "Once or twice."

"Then you know that you're amazingly talented and if for some reason the people in the audition room don't see it…then its their loss."

Jade turns to stare at you, you can feel it and you can barely make out the features of her face. "You're good at that. Making people not feel awful about their terrible lives."

"Thanks." You grin, "Now go to sleep."

{{{ }}}

"I need to ask you something!"

Andre grumbles something unintelligible across the line and you roll your eyes before shouting his name.

"What?! What is it?! Who's dead?!" Andre yelps and you groan, pressing your bare feet against the cold bathroom tile while you blink at the soft morning light seeping under the bathroom door where you sit in the pitch black.

"No one's dead, Andre." You hiss.

"Then why're you calling me so early on a Saturday?" He groans and you sigh, plucking at your toes with the hand not curled around your Pearphone.

"I need help. Advise, actually…I think…" You mutter and Andre sighs, shifting.

"Tor, c'mon."

"What if I told you that Jade West was in my bed right now?" You blurt and there's a frozen silence on the other end.

"I'd ask if you'd lost your mind." Andre says very carefully after a moment and you squeeze your eyes closed.

"What if I told you that this isn't the first time I've woken up beside Jade West and every time I do I spend a long, creepy amount of time watching her sleep." You screech desperately.

"I'd ask if you guys are wearing clothes when this happens?!" He demands and you can tell he's wide awake now.

"Everyone is fully dressed, I just…I'm just…" You trail off, dragging a hand over your face helplessly.

"Ohmygod." Andre breathes. "Oh no."


End file.
